I love steamrollers

Woo hoo. An excellent win on the weekend. A comprehensive thrashing of a team that probably should have done better but was beaten down by a Public Service that is starting to come into its own once again. An offence that has now realised 20 goals in its last three games and a defence that has given up only five goals in the ten matches played this season, suggest that this team is only getting better.

While leading at half time only two goals to nil, one of which was scored right on the whistle, the BNU Public Service had shown considerable dominance over the Porirua City (PC) first team. PC had had a couple of long distance shots at the BNUPS goal, but nothing ever truly threatening the goal. Up front, strikers Jules and Monty were causing all sorts of problems for the PC defence. There were no open goal missus this week, as an increasingly desperate defence, scrambled like crazy and was able to keep Monty and Jules scoreless for most of the half. Jules eventually got a pin point perfect through ball which he chased down and calmly slid past the advancing keeper. Monty hustled late in the half, beat his man and imitated Jules by sliding it past the advancing keeper.

The BNUPS had reffed for the first quarter but when it became apparent that PC had two subs warming up, they asked that the responsibility be taken back. Following this was a series of rather spiteful incidents as Donnie was targeted repeatedly with spiteful shoulders, elbows and hacks to the ankles. Nothing was called, but then again, Nick didn’t make one legal throw all afternoon and he was never called on it.

Half time had the BNUPS finally turning their backs to the sun with a certain sense of inevitability. Two minutes in, Nick was sent down the right wing by BC. He controlled the ball, looked inside and found Donnie about 5 yards outside the 18 yard box. Donnie floated in a perfect pass that Jules, standing on the penalty spot, chested down and volleyed in for a brilliant finish. And then the floodgates opened.

PC did have a half way decent centre back who was reasonably quick and had diffused a number of promising Public Service attacks in the first half. But with the score rising he was forced to push further and further forward, exposing a shockingly soft PC belly. Jules, Monty, Ben, Dan and Phil exploited his absence at every opportunity.

The goal of the game started in bizarre circumstances. Dan had been chopped down brutally, about 15 yards inside the PC half. The freekick was given and BC went to place the ball where the tackle had taken place. The referee decided that the tackle had actually happened pretty much on halfway and sent BC back. Ben, on the side line, cried foul, as did BC. The ref, decided he’d had enough and stormed off shouting “now you don’t have a ref. You’re phuked.” In a wonderfully deflating move, Ben piped up “I’ll ref mate” and liberated the whistle and jacket from his grasp. Ben indicated to BC to bring the ball up to the freekick spot, but BC declined. Instead, in a play reminiscent of Babe Ruth calling the Home Run to right field, BC called Monty’s name and launched ball into the goal mouth. Monty, standing perpendicular to the right hand upright, just outside the 6 yard box watched as the ball floated in. When it became apparent that the ball was not going to arrive at head height, Monty accelerated across the face of goal towards the penalty spot. The ball and Monty arrived at the same moment and with a simply tap, he bent the ball around the keeper and inside the left hand upright, all the while the defence and keeper stood shell-shocked. All class.

Ben and Phil scored solid goals from excellent build up play, Jules reffed, swapped for about three minutes with Monty, just enough time to complete his hattrick before he went back to reffing, allowing Monty to complete his.

In fact Monty could have had four, but for a rare moment of footballing charity. Dan had received the ball from MattNich wide out left. He dribbled in towards the goal, beating one, two and three defenders. Finding himself one on one with the keeper, Dan appeared unsure of quite what to do. And indeed the question remains if he did anything at all. It wasn’t a shot, it was a pass. It just kinda kept rolling towards the goal and then went in. Though Monty was right behind it shepherding it, resisting the desire to give that final tap and add one more to his tally.

Sadly, we weren’t able to keep our own net untouched. A strong low cross found a striker who had managed to leave his marker. A good shot, low and perfectly into the bottom right hand corner was fairly unstoppable. However the shouts of joy and cries of “that was the best defence in the competition, guys!!” kind of made it okay, I guess. At least there is respect there. Only five teams have managed to score against us, and of those five, one was an on goal, one was a mean deflection, two were silly mistakes, and Saturday’s was actually a very good shot. Good work lads.

Servant of the Day: Dan – ran all day, set up a couple, “scored” one. Honourable mention: Jules and Monty, Hattrick heroes.

Dick of the day: Another difficult one. Can’t think of any really, least not on our team. We did have a bit of a “handbag moment”. From a kick off, the ball came at BC at such an angle so as to have the full force of the sun shining directly into his eyes for the almost complete duration of its flight. Consequently he turned away when he realised he had no idea where the ball was and that the red blur in his vision was not a PC jersey but in fact his burning retna. The ball hit the back of his legs and no harm was done, but it was still a bit of a minties moment.

The team: June 9^nd vs Porirua City

Dom
Johnny	Mortgage		Dan
Ben
Nick	Donnie	BC	Phil
	Monty	Jules
Subs	MattNich
Ref
Absentees	Jarrod	Sam	Gimli
	Arnu	AJ
Goals	1st	2nd
	Jules 30’	Jules 48’
	Monty 45’	Monty 54’
		Ben 60’
		Phil 70’
		Jules 78’
		Monty 80’
		Dan 85’

Golden boot: As at June 11

Player	Goals
Ben	12
Phil	8
Monty	7
Jules	6
Jarrod	5
Donnie	3
BC	3
Jones	2
Dan	2
Arnu	1
Gimli	1
Sam	1
Fynny	1
TOTAL	52

CAPITAL 13:

Island Bay Piglets                    6    Petone Martians                2

SV Destroyers                         2    Uni Bombers                     4

Wainuiomata                          2    Karori Swifts                      1

Brooklyn Pints                        2    Uni Lateral                         1

SV Sunshine                          3    Porirua City Mana              2

Western Suburbs                     5    Upper Hutt Slayers             2

Porirua City                             1    Brooklyn Northern              9

                                              P  W  D  L  GF  GA  Pts

Brooklyn Northern                    10  8  2  0  52   5  26

Wainuiomata                           10  7  2  1  25  17  23

SV Sunshine                           10  7  1  2  37  21  22

Brooklyn Pints                         10  7  0  3  28  19  21

Island Bay Piglets                    10  6  0  4  38  36  18

Porirua City                             10  5  0  5  22  25  15

Uni Bombers                           10  4  2  4  17  22  14

Uni Lateral                              10  4  1  5  23  24  13

Karori Swifts                            10  3  3  4  27  24  12

Western Suburbs                     10  4  0  6  21  32  12

Petone Martians                      10  3  2  5  25  34  11

SV Destroyers                         10  2  1  7  23  36   7

Upper Hutt Slayers                  10  1  1  8  27  44   4

Porirua City Mana                      0  1  1  8  20  46   4